Before I begin I want everyone to check out Paula's side boob. OK, now focus.
We are going to try an exercise...it's called "The Paula". Stick your arms straight out in front of you like you are holding a basketball. Now spread your fingers as far apart from each other as they will go. Now clap your hands together in this position without bending your elbows. This is how Paula Abdul claps. This is not what makes her a psycho bitch, but it doesn't help her cause.
Paula is a psycho bitch because she is a pill-popping, American Idol contestant f-ing, firecracker of entertainment. She NEVER makes sense...EVER. For instance, when she was asked on American Idol, why one of the contestants was eliminated, her response was:
"Simon says because one of them ate pizza and the other one ate salad."
She also has a tremendously hard time getting out a full, coherent sentence. This is probably due to the alcohol / drug abuse that is so apparent, yet she denies vehemently.
Back in Paula's hay day she had number one hits, danced with animated characters and dated Emilio Estevez. Life was good. Paula is a different type of APB; she isn't as mean as some of the others but got a double dose of crazy.
Don't worry, Paula, we really do want to "love you forever. Oh, oh, oh!"
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